WELCOME TO MY SPOT!

WELCOME TO MY SPOT!

If you were invited here, I only have one rule......be you, but be kind.

Remember these are my personal reflections and thoughts.
Feel free to comment, become a friend or follower, like or dislike, vote or share.

I welcome you.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Golden Rule = "F" it

Been praying for it and I think I may have finally gotten it. I don't know if it's an answered prayer or if it's just that I'm fed up with my own over thinking and internalizing. Whatever it is, I like it. I like the other side of the coin with the Golden Rule. The rule states do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Lately I have been having this "F" people kind of attitude. Granted no one prays for that or at least they shouldn't but my prayers have been more less a plea for a coping mechanism that works with my personality. So far..."F" it seems to work just fine for me. I already told you I didn't know if it was an answered prayer or not...that's my disclaimer! Anyhoo. I have taken into account the Golden Rule and I notice that it can be applied to communication as well, not just action. For some of us action is communication so this rule can be injected into both and produce a viable outcome just the same. How be it evah, I have come to personalize this Golden Rule with my own interpretation. I will treat some as I wished to be treated and others like they want to be treated.  

Over the Thanksgiving holidays I put this little experiment into action with 3 lab rats.

Rat 1, let's call that one Selfish. Selfish thought it was ok to be inconsiderate and only think of things that will directly affect their life with no regard of my thoughts and feelings. I was ok with that and did the same then was asked if something was wrong? Nope. Not at all.

Rat 2, is Overwhelmer. OW for short. OW thought they could belittle me because they were out of their comfort zone and in my territory. Age played a role in that I am younger and things should be done the way they do it. Well I just kept reminding OW of where they were and how things run on my side letting them know opinions on their part is null and void.

Rat 3, Sneaky. Sneaky thought it could withhold important information something that would have once been shared but chosen not to divulged. I went right on ahead and as a matter of fact let Sneaky know that I already knew. What wasn't made known is that I have decided to change the dynamics of our relationship severing the once close knit ties. Demoting to just ...blase and casual.

They all had the same reaction to my sudden change in behavior...SURPRISED! I applied the Golden Rule. I would say the experiment proved successful. Are they ok with it?...Ahhhh "F" it! No one is exempt.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Chicken Titties

When Little Miss turned about 6 years old she learned about the power of her tongue. She learned what is appropriate to say and what she can't say. In the many wonderful things she does express, phrases, sayings, frustrations, etc. there is one that amuses her little soul. Some girls her age have imaginary friends she has "tickle words". Her favorite is "Butt Naked". Every time she says it, she bursts into laughter. I don't know why it sounds so funny to her, but I can identify. I know the power of words, how they carry weight and can alter atmosphere. I know although when spoken, they are invisible to the eye, but they are beheld in the heart. Words are expensive and cheap.

I think about an episode on Girlfriends when William is having an affair with his boss and when she says the word "Litigious", it made his nature rise. Of course she enunciates the L in Litigious and her tongue swipes the top of her lip when she says it but that's the effect his tickle word had on him.

Now for Dollar Bill, her tickle word is Astringent. She makes up conversation out of the clear blue so she can use that word. When she does say it, she changes her voice and carries the "Astringggggg" part out, then she giggles at herself.

My tickle word? Chicken Titties! I know you are wondering how did I come to liking Chicken Titties. I called Milk Dud on my way home from work, soliciting his help with dinner I asked him to take out some chicken breast to thaw. Well he didn't hear me when I get to the breast part because the phone kept going in and out. He could only hear the chicken part. Frustrated he kept asking over and over again, what kind, drums or breast? I got frustrated with screaming breast!! BREAST! over and over again. Needless to say he still didn't get it. On the final scream (phone working proper by now) I yelled "Chicken Titties! Pull out the damn Chicken Titties! Can you hear me now?!" So now, jokingly when I ask him to pull out some chicken breast, I replace it with Chicken Titties and it makes us laugh.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Don't Like Funes!

I spoke to JO Smooth on the phone who is in his mid sixties and he made a startling discovery about himself that he had to share with me. I was grateful that his attitude is contrary to his age by his new discovery. He said..."I don't see how Kenny like doing this shit! Every week he's at somebody's wake or fune (funeral). Why when people get up in age, they like doing this shit for recreation?" then he proceeded with..."Man I hate going to funes!" I was tickled yet relived. This led me to believe, that in his heart, he is not yet up in age and he thinks going to funerals is not cool. He's not ready to embrace he could be heading closer to his turn in the casket. He's so smooth. I just love his zest and way of thinking for a person his age.


Well this weekend was my turn to make a call to him with the same conclusion. He could be thinking his time is winding down and this is not what he wants to do for sport in his free time alive. I was thinking this is so final, sad, long and drawn out. Nevertheless we agree, we don't like funes!


At this funeral though I was thinking how I would want mine to be and who would be present. I want a Jazz Funeral much like this one! (Click Here to see what I'm talking about!) No singing slow and sad songs and the service should be an 1.5 tops. I would want folks to wear bright vibrant colors and remember the better parts of me. The preacher should make it priority to talk about getting your life together and accepting Christ. For the re-pass, a family potluck with some good music and good company.


But it's not up to me. I won't be there. I just hope that mine is not like some I've attended because honestly...I do not like funes!!!!

Friday, November 11, 2011

Don't Call Me

Black Magic and I were talking about names we can and cannot accept. The question posed was "If a guy called you a Bitch or Hoe (whore) which of the two would insult you more than the other?" We both agreed that they shouldn't call us either one but let's face it...they do. It's already established that everyone knows better. So then it comes down to which is the lesser of the two evils for you personally. We both picked a man would get cussed out if they referred to either one of us as a Hoe.

When he calls you a hoe he's aiming to insult you, especially if he doesn't know you. His ego may have gotten bruised resulting in an involuntary reaction and that was the best he could come up with at a short notice. It could be for a number of reasons. Whatever the reason is though he's an asshole with cussing out coming his way. He takes a stab at the stain on your reputation, attempting to flaw your character when he calls you a hoe. Folks know hoes. They know that it can be a dirty and demeaning job, to be one professionally or amateur, whether out of necessity or for fun. They know hoes can be hollow and open for any and everybody, used up and worn out. Sure she can be paid and live outwardly affluent but everybody takes from them and there's no lady left in a hoe to show for it....they are just hoes... dumped into that soiled category.

Now if he calls you a Bitch, well you can live with that. He's only tagging your attitude and that really is up to you to do as you please with it. You may have good reason to be a bitch. Some people prefer that attitude as also their means for communication. That might be the best way they relate or understand what you convey. Bitches don't have to give up their wholesome to be prosperous like hoes do. You can take a bitch home to meet momma and marry her. You can be a bitch and no one has to know until you get ready to introduce that alter ego and yes it can be an alter ego. Easily turned off and on at your discretion. That's what I like about a bitch.

But I tell you what I don't like out of all the names I have been called. Don't call me "Dear"! I hate when people call me that! It sounds so condescending to me like I am beneath someone as if I am a child they are referring to. I don't know why but it does. Don't call me that shit either!

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Mmmmm Cannndy



I have a sweet tooth for all sorts of candies but Chocolate is my preference over any others. I like chocolate because it's rich, dark, textured, can melt easily and then solidify when cooled. It can take shape, you can add other ingredients to it and sometimes it leaves an aftertaste. I like it too because it compliments other items like fruits and cuisines. Very versatile. Most of all it compliments me. Let's not talk about the things chocolate can do. I've known it to be the perfect remedy for PMS or depression, the top over after a perfect meal, or just the right amount of caffeine for a pick me up. It can do wonders!


However the older I get and the way society has made acceptance these days I have to think if I would ever have a specific taste for a different sort of candy. It never really occurred to me before of a serious interest in other sorts but I notice now that sorted candies have taken an obvious interest in my flavor. Hey Nah!


I love my Snickers and will not betray my love as long as I am vowed to that deep rich chocolate hunger conciliate. But if circumstances changed I wonder if I would opt to not discriminate and make a Zero my new hero. Hee Hee Hee... I'm just sayin', couldn't it satisfy me too?


SERIOUSLY?! Did you really think I was talking about candy? Duh!

Tuesday, November 08, 2011

You Cry Baby




It has been 2,361 days or you could say 6 years, 5 months 17 days and counting since she left me. You'd think I'd be over it by now but I will never get over it. I still have the ugly face, snotting nose, baritone gut wrenching bellowing boo-hoos when I think of her 1 second too long. The thoughts of her could strike at any given moment. I could be on a drive home from work and boom! Water works on! I could be watching TV, or cooking, or taking a shower, whatever the case though I am always alone when it happens. It's better that way. I go through resentment, anger, happy thoughts, things I want to tell her, things I wonder if she'd approve if she knew I behaved in a certain way. I always needed her approval, her validation.

I think my grandmother would be proud of me most of the time but to this day I still cry. I cry like a big baby. Sometimes I lay across the bed and have my tantrum kicking and screaming too. I'm smiling at the thought of it. If she knew I did that she would say ...."Nah Boid (Bird) cut all that shit out!" LOL! I loved her with all the heart one person could have to love someone. Even in her eternal absence I still need her. I need her voice. Her meals. Her scolding. Her hugs. Her spoilings...oh she had favorites too. I need her wisdom. Her potty mouth. Her gossip. Her history. Her voodoo ( lol). I need her healings. Her prayers. Her prophecies. I need her hands.

Her birthday is this month and I will think about her as natural as it is for me to breathe. The best advice I can give myself is ...You go on and cry Baby.

Monday, November 07, 2011

Entitled

I have my parents to blame and I can see this same vicious cycle is happening all over again. I'm doing the same thing with my kids. I tell them how beautiful they are. I let them know that it really is all about them. I let them know just how treasured and valuable they are and how much potential they posses simply because they were born. That's what a proud parent is supposed to do right...pedestal their own? The problem is not the doing, its the reason, the simply because they were born. It's because of the reason I get the spanking.

I was told the same things growing up and that's what I believed. All of it is true, to this day I am all of those things my parents said I was BUT not because I was born. I had to work at it. I learned the hard way most of the time but I later found out that you have to put in some work and get hurt too. You have to endure somethings, experiences and accounts and you have lose too. I wonder what can I do to start letting them know these things. As a parent how can I evenly parallel the doing and the reason without compromising one for the other?

I know they will get it as I've gotten it and maybe it's best the world shows them better than I can explain, but I don't want the cost to be devastating or them to be hard learners. I simply cannot stand people who act like they should have simply because they were born.

Tuesday, November 01, 2011

Expired

At this very moment
A mother sighs frustrated by a child of hers who lied
Someone is touched by a sincere sentiment and someone right now could use a breath mint

At this very moment
Someone is passing into an afterlife while she pushes out baby with all her might
He is looking out of the window in deep contemplation and they are gaming on play station

Right this second
A crime is taking place simultaneously a death sentence seals some one's fate
Far far away starvation is epidemic here our concern is who we go to lunch with

At this moment a Diva steps out of the salon chair the same time as a dad cuts his little man's hair
Somebody is being heart broken as we speak and somebody collecting child support this week

At this very moment someone is thinking damn the sex was great while others are thinking they could have had V8
As the world turns around and around just keep in mind your up could be their down