Dieting

The conversation started off very businesslike, we got all of the pleasantries out of the way and came to a resolve about the air condition problem. I noticed he wanted to talk to me about that before he forgets but getting off the phone is better, because he needed me to not notice something else while we talked. Too bad, I know him like the back of my hand.

As we drew near the end of the conversation I asked, "Hey! You Smokin?". I can hear the 'Damn I'm busted' in his reply, "Yeah..What?". I scolded him with..."You know you are not supposed to be smokin no damn cigars!...Not that kind of tabaca (tobacco)!!!" Mind you, I am at work. So I lower my voice to a whisper and continue with the scolding. Then he gets real serious and all 'matter-of-fact' with the tone of his voice when he says "Listen to me". Oh, he called be by my first name too! (It's reeeal serious now) I'm thinking...OK maybe his health is at risk again and if that's what he wants to do in his last days, who am I to judge.

Surely what other reason could it be? This dude was serious in his voice and in his heart that he should go back to smoking because his clothes doesn't fit anymore. I never laughed so hard.

He said that he was getting too big and all he does it eat! WTF!! I asked him why doesn't he go on a diet or cut his portions down. He attempted to convincingly explain that's exactly what he was doing. And I quote ..."Smokin is my diet."  He went on to tell me that a cup of coffee and a cigar in the morning keeps him from eating because he's not hungry so then he can go all day without eating. Again I say... WTF!!! This in no way can be healthy. I let him know that too! Then I told JO Smooth he's got to get off my phone. I had to go back to work so he can get back to his dieting. Arrrugh I give up!

Never Say Never My Ass



You know how you are never supposed to say never? I have been a victim of saying never only to be proven wrong on more than one occasion. I know it's a tough statement that's tested, tried and true but I honestly believe there are some things I can and will say NE'VAH to. There's not many but here goes...

1. At this age I will never have another child! You will see me on the 5 o'clock news!

2. I will never again allow anyone to clip my wings.

3. I will never have to worry about where I will spend eternity.

4. I will never let anyone use me up.

5. I will never fit into a size 0 again! LOL! I can't believe I used to be that size. That's virtually invisible!

So there you have it. Those are my Nevers.

Keep Your Mouth Shut

It's amazing the impression we leave on people. What's also amazing is we don't know how sometimes. It can be from a first meeting, a heightened experience, or it could be from nothing at all just standing across the room and someone sees you.


I was just washing my hands in the restroom and there was a lady in there doing the same. As I got ready to dry my hands, I took a good look in the mirror at the woman next to me who just turned off the water in her sink. I always do this when time is still. I observe and dissect those around me especially when they aren't looking and she wasn't looking. When I was done washing, I patted my hands dry on the napkin and merely said, "Hey Howya Doin" and smiled at her, you know, being southern and nice. Immediately she said my name followed by a "right?" Nah hold on, let's review. Don't owe money, check. Ain't sleeping around, check.  Never in my life seen you before Lady, check. OK, safe to answer. I hesitantly replied with a slow yes, but the side eye must have said it all. She then told me, "I recognize your voice."  She introduced herself.."Hi, I'm Inas!". I knew who she was then and to confirm I finished her introduction by saying her last name.


I had only spoken to this lady over the phone 3 or 4 times tops and they were very short work-related conversations. I remembered her because of her name. I like the sound of it, its strong, powerful (has to mean something I'm sure), also I like the way it rolls off the tongue. She left an impression on me with her name, subsequently, I left one on her with my voice. Now if I could make some money leaving impressions with my voice. Do you think I would make a good phone sex operator? LOL!

When the Devil Beats His Wife

There's an old saying we like to say down South when the sun is shining and it's raining at the same time, "the devil is beating his wife". The correct term for this phenomenon is sunshower. I love when that happens because in spite of the rain, there's the sun. I feel hopeful and still happy. 

Do you believe that the weather plays a major role in the way you're going to feel when you wake up in the morning? For the last couple of days or so it's been overcasting and ranging from cool to cold. I'm not a big fan of winter but if I had to choose I'll pick winter over summer because you can get warm but can't get cool. 

With the grey clouds comes sprinkles of rain that dampens the ground and my mood. It puts me in the funk. I need sunshine for me to shine. Of course I can make myself be happy if the weather is dull. I'll use my inner happiness for that. But sometimes I think God does it to purposely slow us down. Not to make us feel devitalized but to allow us to appreciate more than one weather induced sun-shiny emotion while, reiterating who He is.  

It takes more of an effort when the weather is cloudy to put yourself in a jovial mood...at least for me. I appreciate that He shows me He still commands me and that even the power of how I wake up and feel in the mornings doesn't always belong to me.

DJ Don't

Recently at my job a group of us were working an event to elevate morale of the employees by passing out T-shirts and tickets to a college football game. Along with passing out those items we had to show team spirit and arouse the crowd waiting in line. To add to all of the excitement already included were snacks, beverages, cheers and chants, and a DJ. What did they have a DJ for?

Everything was going just fine when techno music and country songs were being played. Everyone seemed to be calm and enjoying the atmosphere and focused on their tasks of handing out items and checking for ID's for about a good hour or so. Well that wasn't enough. Our operation was going too smooth and we were ahead of schedule at the bare end of hand-outs....when the music changed.

They started playing songs with bass and beats. They were playing Hip Hop songs like Drop it Low, and Look at Me Now. All of us who are Black had that same look on our faces and we started shaking our heads. Our shoulders and chest begin to move. I was already finger popping and getting wound up...it starts and the top and you know what's going to happen next. The goal is not to let it go the hips. Please! Please! Please Lawd don't let it go to the hips!!! Especially not in front of all these white folks and.... On My Job! We all knew. We all knew the rules. We fought it and held out as long as we could. However, a gentleman member of our "National United Negro Association In Front These White Folks" (who shall remain nameless..(Lawrence)) took the daring lead and did something so clever to save us all, he asked the DJ to turn the music back to a different genre. We shot him a look of gratefulness and wiped the sweat from our brow. 

Don't they know? Certain music to "our kind" is mesmerizing and there's no escape. It matters not where you are, who's company you're in or what you are doing. I'm like the snake. When a snake charmer blows that stupid flute, I can't help it. I hear the call and I have to dance. And don't let it be MY JAM! Ohhhh Nooo! It's on and popping like fish grease! BUT...Not in front these white folks.... On...My...JOB!

I'm a little worried. It's the seventh day of December and I have nothing pressing in my spirit or on my mind to write about. I'm sad about that. I love the way things stir inside me and how I plot about what I'm going to write. I love even more when the finished product proves me wrong. Sure I think about some things but lately nothing is pressing. I really am numb. Don't feel like fussing. Don't want to complain about anything. I don't care who comes or goes. All I want to do is sleep. Oh well....that's too bad.